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Message |
    
Bill Nelson
Unity Member
Post Number:
1799
Registered: 10-2002
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Saturday, March 25, 2006 - 09:30 am: |   |
Three mischievous grandmas were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home. About then Steve Lodge walked by, and one of the old grandmas yelled out saying, "We bet we can tell exactly how old you are, Steve!"
Steve said, "There ain't no way you can guess it, you old fools."
One of the ornery grandmas said, "Sure we can! Just drop your under shorts and we can tell your exact age."
Embarrassed just a little, Steve dropped his drawers. The grandmas stared at him for a while, asked him to turn around a couple of times, asked him to jump up and down for a little while and then they all piped up and said,
"You're 85 years old!"
"How in the world did you guess?!?" He was awed.
The ornery old grandmas, snickered and laughed. Slapping their knees and grinning from ear to ear, all three happily yelled in unison, "Because we were at your birthday party yesterday!"
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Tom Elkins
Hsympothai Member
Post Number:
389
Registered: 01-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Saturday, March 25, 2006 - 12:01 pm: | |
Hey Steve - did you hear Bill had to go to the doctor this week? The nurse asked him to sit down. He said he'd prefer to stand. Finally the doc came in and asked him what the problem was.
"Well, I've got these bad cuts on my...uh...butt, and I thought maybe I need some stitches."
"Let me see them," said the doc. Bill dropped his pants, revealing a deep laceration across each cheek. "My God! How did that happen?"
"There's a big field beside my house, and the bluebonnets came into bloom this week. They looked so pretty I decided to pick me some. I walked into the field and squatted down, and that's when it happened."
"You cut your buttocks just squatting down in a field of bluebonnets?"
"Yeah.....I was wearing spurs at the time."
Tom Elkins
NORTH of TEXAS
www.authorsden.com/tomelkins |
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